“Just Listen: Discover the Secret to Getting Through to Absolutely Anyone”
By Mark Goulston, MD; AMACOM,
New York, New York; 2009; 232 pages; $24.95

The author’s premise is based on the old adage that “successful negotiating depends on listening to what’s being said and reacting intelligently to it.” According to Dr. Goulston, a successful psychiatrist who is well respected in both the business and medical communities, that old maxim applies as much to selling as it does to talking a potential suicide off a ledge of a tall building. The steps are essentially the same, according to Goulston.
Dr. Goulston believes that the techniques of persuading others are easy to adopt and use. He calls them the “persuasion cycle,” which has five steps:

“From relating to listening
“From listening to considering
“From considering to willing to do
“From willing to do to doing
“From doing to glad they did and continuing to do.”

The author builds on the foundation of this cycle by first establishing “nine core rules for getting through to anyone,” followed by “12 quick and easy ways to achieve buy-in and get through.” These two sections form most of the book. These two major sections are unusually well and interestingly written. More importantly they put the book’s points across in ways that help them stick in your mind.
In addition, Dr. Goulston addresses issues in this book that are rarely handled well, or dealt with at all. For example, in Chapter 11, titled “Steer Clear of Toxic People,” lists several categories, including bullies, both in and out of the workplace. Here are his comments on how to deal with a bully:
“Bullies come after you because they think you’re easy prey. Refuse to follow their script, and they’ll usually give up and seek an easier target.
“Sometimes, of course, there’s no good way to stand up to a bully. For instance, if you desperately need your current job and our boss has the power to hire and fire on a whim, your only real option may be to lay low, minimize contact with the person, and look for a less toxic work environment. Even in this case, however, you’ll be a less desirable target if you stop looking vulnerable.
“When a bully tries to intimidate you by verbally attacking you, do this. Make eye contact. Act perfectly polite but ever-so-slightly bored, as if your mind is elsewhere. Let your body language transmit the same message: Stand up straight, be relaxed, and cock your head as if you’re listening but not very hard. Let our arms hang casually, stead of folding them defensively across your chest. Often, this response makes bullies feel uncomfortable or even foolish and causes them to back down.
“…Bullies act the way they do because they get away with it, but deep down most of them know it’s not an ideal strategy. Sometimes they just need someone to say that to their face.”
There is a plain spoken quality to the book that’s decidedly “unbookish.” The net result is that “Just Listen” offers theory, sparsely, concisely and clearly. Its easily remembered examples abound in every chapter. This is very much in keeping with the philosophical basis of the book. As Goulston puts it:
“Most people upshift when they want to get through to other people. They persuade. They encourage. They argue. They push. And in the process they create resistance. …But when you downshift, you’ll do exactly the opposite—you’ll listen, ask, mirror, and reflect back to people what you’ve heard. When you do, they will feel seen, understood, and felt—and that unexpected downshift will draw them to you.”
“Just Listen” is a banquet of approaches and ideas that’s easy to devour the first time around, and a flavorful feast whenever you use portions as a reference book. It’s certainly one of the best how-to books of the year.
-- Henry Holtzman

Here are the current top 10 bestselling books for business. The list is compiled based on information received from retail bookstores throughout the U.S.A.

1. “In FED We Trust: Ben Bernanke’s War on the Great Panic,”
by David Wessel (Crown Publishing…$17.54) (2)*
What happened in “the Fed” during 2008 and 2009.
2. “How to Smell a Rat: The Five Signs of Financial Fraud,”
by Ken Fisher (John Wiley & Sons…$24.95) (7)
When an investment seems too good to be true, it usually is.
3. “Outliers: The Story of Success,”
by Malcolm Gladwell (Little, Brown & Co…$27.99) (1)
Why the cause of success can be linked to where you were born.
4. “Panic: The Story of Modern Financial Insanity,”
by Michael Lewis (W.W. Norton & Co…$27.95) (3)
How underpricing financial risks led to economic catastrophe.
5. “The Secret of Shelter Island: Money and What Matters,”
by Alexander Green (Wiley & Sons…$26.95) (4)
A road map to a rich life with or without lots of money.
6. “The First Tycoon: The Epic Life of Cornelius Vanderbilt,”
by T.J. Stiles (Knopf Doubleday…$37.50) (5)
How the first owner of multiple industry categories did it.
7. “Nice Girls Don’t Get Rich: 75 Avoidable Mistakes Women Make with Money,”
by Lois P. Frankel (Grand Central…$21.95) (6)
Why more women inherit real wealth than create it.
8. “The Madoff Chronicles: Inside the Secret World of Bernie and Ruth,”
by Brian Ross (Hyperion…$19.99) (**)
The people who made the original Ponzi scheme look small.
9. “Suze Orman’s 2009 Action Plan,”
by Suze Orman (Spiegel & Grau…$9.99) (8)
Suze offers her classic advice for survival in tough times.
10. “Street Fighters: The Last 72 Hours of Bear Stearns, the Toughest Firm on Wall Street,”
by Kate Kelly (Penguin Group. $25.95) (9)
Why the toughest kid on the block couldn’t assure survival.

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*(1) -- Indicates a book's previous position on the list.
** -- Indicates a book's first appearance on the list.